maybe i really have to shutup because what i think is like upup in the cotton candy sky, never touching the ground. it doesnt make sense and it just might never will so i shouldnt make things worse by telling people things that 1.makes them even more muddled 2.wastes their time and 3.doesnt make them feel any better.

maybe im just too used to your presence, too used to the thought of you lingering at the back of my mind, that i am dellusional that i am fantasizing. its become a bad habit, nothing more.

unfeeling's the word, its like nothing goes beyond this barrier of emotion, that everything lies on the deep surface.

at least my brain's still functioning, even if its the wrong, wonky way.

i think mr chua sees improvement, i think we're on a better track than before, it couldve been this way much earlier but somehow it didnt happen.

once youve tasted the best, its hard to settle for second best no matter how unique it is (eeesnt it ahaha) like an alien who doesnt want to become human.

i wish i had time to study. me and verin came to a consensus that studying is actually veryvery extremely fun, and we concluded that in a serious no sarcasm tone. WE'RE SREIOUS IT GIVES YOU JOY