Wednesday, January 30, 2008

and thats the way the cookie crumbles.

i feel lie i just finished reading a super good book. the ones where you're sucked into it. you see the trees you feel everything the character feels you're like a ghost in the story there but not there.

and the story has finally ended.

lets hope there's no part 2 my loves <3

breaking up was never easy

even if it's between friends. best friends.

--
are my wishes so naive? so unattainable that all people do is trample and spit on them without even digging deep in their hearts to see if its true?

am.i.that.dellusional?

Fairytales have never been something to hold on to. Discuss.

--
:how many people believe that there is something good in everyone? every single person?

i still stand by my answer.

is it wrong?

--
maybe im expecting too much. maybe its time to tone down and watch the world go by.

what do you do when you dont know what to do? the clock's ticking.

i cant believe it's only been 4 weeks. time doesnt pass that slowly.

Friday, January 25, 2008

erased.

love is not selfish

Let there be love.

Who kicked a hole in the sky
so the heavens will cry over me
who stole the soul from the sun
and the world come undone at the seams
let there be love
let there be love
I hope the weather is calm
as you sail up your heavenly stream

suspended clear in the sky
are the words that we sing in our dreams
let there be love (x4)
come on baby blue
shake up your tired eyes
the world is waiting for you

may all your dreaming fill the empty sky
but if it makes you happy
keep on clapping
just remember I'll be by your side
and if you don't let go
it's gonna pass you by
who kicked a hole in the sky
so the heavens will cry over me
who stole the soul from the sun
and the world come undone at the seams
let there be love
ENGLISH
We'll begin with a box, and the plural is boxes;
But the plural of ox became oxen not oxes.
One fowl is a goose, but two are called geese,
Yet the plural of moose should never be meese.
You may find a lone mouse or a nest full of mice;
Yet the plural of house is houses, not hice.
If the plural of man is always called men,
Why shouldn't the plural of pan be called pen?
If I spoke of my foot and show you my feet,
And I give you a boot, would a pair be called beet?
If one is a tooth and a whole set are teeth,
Why shouldn't the plural of booth be called beeth?
Then one may be that, and three would be those,
Yet hat in the plural would never be hose,
And the plural of cat is cats, not cose.
We speak of a brother and also of brethren,
But though we say mother, we never say methren.
Then the masculine pronouns are he, his and him,
But imagine the feminine, she, shis and shim.

Let's face it, English is a crazy language.
There is no egg in eggplant, nor ham in hamburger;
Neither apple nor pine in pineapple.
English muffins weren't invented in England.

We take English for granted.
But if we explore its paradoxes,
We find that quicksand can work slowly,
Boxing rings are square and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea, nor is it a pig.
And why is it that writers write but fingers don't fing,
Grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham?
Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends,
But not one amend?
If you have a bunch of odds and ends
And get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it?
If teachers taught,
Why didn't preachers praught?
If a vegetarian eats vegetables,What does a humanitarian eat?

Sometimes, I think all the folks who grew up speaking English should be committed to an asylum for the verbally insane.
In what other language do people recite at a play and play at a recital?
Ship by truck and send cargo by ship?
Have noses that run and feet that smell?
How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites?
You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your house can burn up as it burns down;
in which you fill in a form by filling it out and in which an alarm goes off by going on.
Where did this strange language come from and why do we speak it?
'Cause we don't know another, I guess...

read it when i was young, read it again recently and oh how ingenius it is.

--
ive always wanted to be a pillar of strength for at least one person, so it breaks my heart to see the people around me crumble.

is this the effects of stress? or are we blaming what we cannot resolve on it; a convenient excuse for our troubles? i just hope whatever it is, it does a david copperfield on us.

--
msa1 (pronounced mer-sai) is finally over (: it wasnt that big of a burden, but it was definitely extra stress. coming back home from school at night and having to read sloman wasnt very fun, but ya at least ive learnt stuff.

my maths is seriously fcuked. read bad. i want to study. siglap anytime soon? how bout the airport? i really dont want anything less than a B on my Alevel cert. i wont ever live it down, wont ever live with the thought of what i couldve done to make it better.

--
life so far has been an eye-opener.

up down and touch the ground it puts me in the mood.
up down and touch the ground, in the mood for food.

yea we(fay and i) eat when we're feeling stressed/frustrated. our hot new item on the menu: icecream waffles from the pop cafe. the first experience was disgusting but now its daaaamn good. (:

--
anyway, thank you ameer for your virus and bacteria repelling strudel. i havent eaten it in ages <3

and thankyou xiangyi for the pretty boots. it was just what i needed.

thank you mingjiangcake for being such a nice guy and meeting me way earlier than usual to take 966 with me. k la your bag's damn nice, if i see anyone with the same one, ill do you a favour and pour cherryslurpee on it so they have to throw it away k?

--
your world is your thoughts, so if you keep thinking of bad things, what kind of world do you think you live in?

happy thoughts is the way to go. happy thoughts makes the world go round.

--
feels good to know that someone's got your back so thankyou everyone who made me feel that way (: i hope you know ive got all your backs too

--
all the best for arion vs sajc tomorrow my dear girls (: life's hard, but we're gna go through it side by side k. cheer up, i miss the lights in your eyes. we can do it, you know we can.

Sunday, January 20, 2008

listen to my heart can you hear it sing? telling me to give you everything.

13-1, we lost, but we were winners, i could tell.

so many injuries but we fought through, so many inexperienced but we've learnt, so many worries but we overcame them. how can we not be the winners? finally im seeing a little bit of hope, a little more than before.

tammy's one line changed my outlook on jc2 life. though its gna be a son of a bitch im gna have to go through it. and im gna go through it my way - happily. no more going to school for school. im going to school for me. tutorials are fun and so are practicals. notes are cool and textbooks are so primary school. the last year of jc. a few more months and we're free. free, with no regrets.

spend every day of this year like there isnt going to be another, because there really isnt. sis said before. every day down is another day cloesr to death.

i love my friends. im getting to love my classmates. i just wish everyone would love themselves, and love me back.

i still want to be an audience, but there's no way. you cant be an audience of your own life. its impossible.

hi dad, bye dad.

Friday, January 18, 2008

seeing the world as sheets and sheets of canvases. green grass, white paths, black roads. the atmosphere is a pattern. the shadows are patterns. the sky, clouds, they're paintings, painted with different strokes of the brush and mixes of colours.

walking home has never felt so beautiful.

long but good day. its been long since i felt this way.

happy birthday verin (: although we didnt celebrate with an awesome bigbang, i hope you liked it.

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

to mingjiangCAKE.

cos he complains i dont update. i wanted to!had blog entries written in my head but i think taiwan kena-d some typhoon or some sort again cos my internet was screwing up. it's still screwed up now

--
today i stayed at home =D feels good. ate slept ate TIDIED MY BOOKSHELVE ate came online ate. see at least i was productive!

went to school yesterday, stayed through bio lect then took green slip back. sucha waste of time. but at least i got to go to the polyclinic to see the doc! i felt so bad cos my mum kept cutting queues for me :P next time when im a mum i hope im a nurse then i can cut queues for my girl too!

HAD TO TAKE A BLOOD TEST K ): cos the doc thought i had dengue )): ouch. even though she used a baby needle(cos my vein's tiny(cos i dont do housework according to her)) it was still traumatising ): lucky for me ive got a reason to not donate blood. (underweight (: )

i knew i didnt havedengue!(make me take the blood test for nothing >:( ) but it was so scary when i walked back into the doc's room he was like
:well carin...lucky we took a blood test today ah.

like omfgosh what happened to me. but in the end it was nothing serious (: what are lymphocytes and g-something g-somethings so cool next time if im a nurse i'll go see a doctor and like 'oh my __ levels are high that means ive _______ and i need to __________ to lower it in case ______' HAHAHHAHA.

now ive got quite a few pills to eat and i gotta watch the time to make sure i eat them at correct times. at least cough syrup tastes good. (dont call me weird my sis likes them too! it runs in the family shhhhhhh)

so..cross country tomorrow, dont know if im gna run. ive already been threatened by two people to get tied up if i try running thank you for your concern (: but ah we'll see.

thanks so much for caring for carin while she's sick (:

--

BAND CONCERT 27th jan! tickets for 12 bucks! GO OK.
MERIDIAN DANCE CONCERT 28th feb! 15/18 bucks! GO OK.
--

lots of other things i should be writing about but i forgot =/ stm heh. will do another day then. gnightt!

Monday, January 7, 2008

still water lies deep

im just afraid this undercurrent proves too much to handle. its overwhelming. prove me wrong prove me wrong make it go away.

most tiring training today. and to think itll happen 8 times weekly. woh. goodbye hot bod hello skin and bones.

Saturday, January 5, 2008

so its has been the first three days of school. boring.

its a lil better than last year though. feel a little more motivated this time. maybe cos we're all expecting a miracle from the new principal.

first three days was filled with teachers telling us there's loads to look forward to this year.

and first chinese lesson of the year got me into trouble again >:( in roxanne's words: mwroar. stupid shit its not like i didnt try to go.

anyway friday was the most eventful. school, training(sorry i was a psk ): ) then darrell's sister's party. so funny more of his friends went than his sister's. happy birthday darrell's sister!

nic did another chalet stunt it was damn funny. ok im sorry nic i made you drink so much! i tried to make up for it okay! hahaha.

twas pretty boring cos we just sat in a group played five ten watched people drink and hope they get drunk. then nic got drunkish and we stopped playing and shifted our attention to him (:

seriously though i cant imagine how immatured anyone can get. 'im ____ and im gna beat you up! you hear me?! im gna beat you up!' oh yea i hear you dammit. i might as well watch a little boy beat up his dead goldfish yknow.
you think you so cool? i roll my china eyes at you man. obviously you havent been through puberty.

OLE tomorrow i hope the shifts didnt screw up dammit.

im doing work YAY. lets hope its enough.

Wednesday, January 2, 2008

sweet dreams are made of these. who am i to disagree.

:if i'm gna be a parent i wanna be like mummy and daddy. dont you?
:no.
:why!?
cos i dont want my children to end up like me

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why not be the audience? why not watch the movie in your comfortable chair, no relation to it at all, cry when its sad, laugh when its happy, scream when its angry. why not watch it through these eyes, why go inside and worry about all the things you'd have to worry about? no one sees you noone cares there is no need to care. all you need to do, is enjoy it with your heart, and your soul.

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why not be that actor? where's the script? cant be no actor without your script now.